Not so high and mighty – musings from Meria, Corsica this time!

 We are having a week’s holiday in the north of Corsica. It’s beautiful. This morning we decided to go for a hike that promised to be stunning and it was, until we reached a really high point on the cliff top where the path narrowed and the drop was not protected by any vegetation. I turned into a blob of useless jelly: stuck fast to the side, unable to go forward or back . I tried- I so wanted to go on . I was  angry with myself for being so pathetic but my heart was pounding and I felt sick. I could not look down. Sweat and tears down my face shielded by my sunglasses. Vertigo is a wicked affliction that grows and grows with the passing of time . I am no longer a mountain goat. Happier in the sea than on high ground. Oh well but really disappointed with myself ! A swim in the sea, the walk back and then we saw this that made me smile!
 Fireman on his lunch break – priceless!

No Smoking….

 

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It’s one year to the day that Frog and I decided to give up smoking. We had both gone for a health check in late July. I was fine apart from slightly raised blood pressure – not really surprising given everything that was going on but poor Frog was told that his lungs were in a very, very bad way. Some people are just doomed if they smoke..

So September 1st 2015 it started . At 11.00am Frog said – well we could have one. I said no – shut up Frog. The day passed in a haze of not knowing what to do with my right hand , it kept twitching. Was so sad that I wasn’t even hungry and didn’t even want a glass of wine. At 11.00pm Frog said “we could have one now”. I said “NO FROG!!!” and so we went from week to week . Hard! I got fatter even though I didn’t eat any more but have lost it now. Frog got fatter and continues to . Régime for him after holidays.

So liberating though after the first month, fresh mouth, fresh air . Can tell a smoker that passes me in the street. Have given up in the past but always thought I would start again in old age  but this time it’s forever. I just hate the smell. I love having a minty mouth. I love not paying more than our rent in cigarettes and feeling anxious  about  not having enough for the weekend.  I will never say no to anyone who wants to smoke chez moi  cos I understand but …So goodbye to Vogue menthols, I loved you for a while but I love me more. And Frog, I am still watching you and it’s still NO!

 

Fade to grey….not likely it’s silver!

I was very excited and flattered to be asked to write a blog about my hair. You know who you are LB and thank you.  So this is the story.

 

I never really played around with the colour of my hair when I was younger, maybe because I  quite liked what I had: thick dark brown hair with natural hints of bronze. Yes I toyed with perms in the 70’s and 80’s- almost always a disaster  ranging from the poodle look to Louis XIV. I guess I started having low-lights in my  mid to late 30’s when the grey was begining to show and it looked good but maybe a bit like everyone else especially in my part of London. And boy was it time consuming and expensive! Every six weeks – 4 hours of a numb bum and by then roots showing after 2 weeks and me having to do a paint job at home!

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Natural in my 20’s – my Dad always called me wiggy and I see why!
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One of the better perms but what a startled rabbit face!

 

One day I just questioned and I can’t remember when exactly, maybe about 10 years ago, what lies beneath? I do recall announcing to  my girl friends that I was going to go grey.  A few raised eyebrows- has she finally lost the plot? I persevered. I was curious and I thought it might be more fun to do when my face was still youngish and I could always go back if I didn’t like it. Would I do it now with an older face- possibly not? Glad I did though.

The Process

I announced to James of Pelo in Barnes- my hairdresser then and now ( I still see him every three months when I am in London!). He didn’t bat an eyelid and said yes “we can do this.” He is brilliant and funny by the way and always manages to squeeze me in.  So I guess it took about a year. I never had it cut short but my hair does grow really quickly. We avoided that dreadful “growing out” look by adjusting the low-lights until we stopped and it was actually quite painless. Although dear son, announced one day that I had granny hair! Cheers Tom.

And the final result, I love it. I keep it long cos that is me. The few times that I have cut it short, I have normally ended up by booing my eyes out.  Am sure it’s to due to the traumas of childhood with my mother taking me to a barber’s and having it razored short.  Painful and humiliating. This went on until I was about 12.  I looked more like my brother than he did. ” My darling”she used to say “it maka your ‘air grow tikka” ( she is Italian). I have no idea if she was right or not but thick it was. When I was in my 20’s it took all morning to dry naturally, now it takes about 40 minutes.  It’s not as thick but there is still a lot of hair  so I am grateful. Also the colour is now naturally streaked, black underneath and different nuances from right to left, silver to white. No hint of yellow since I quit smoking.

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Two for the price of one ! I still have hair though and little bro doesn’t.
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I actually quite rocked this at the time but then I got called Spike

 

The Regime

I am extremely lazy. I wash it at least 3 times a week especially after exercise when it ends up soaking and clinging to my head like an old woolly hat. I use no more than twice a week, a special violet shampoo for “silver” hair ( love that, it makes me feel like a fairy!), otherwise shampoo of the moment- Frank Prevost now, condition and then (this is the secret) a  dose of diluted cider vinegar to bring back the shine and rinse. Towel dry and leave. I sometimes try to blow dry it but am useless. I get hot and bored. So I prefer to turn my head upside down and give it a final blast with the dryer.  Depending on the madness of the final result, I either leave it loose or clip it up.  I love my hair clips and there are days when I just need to do a Patsy from Ab Fab.  It makes me feel taller! Result- baby soft and shiny.

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2010 off to a black tie do
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and more recently. forgive the poor photo – I am not of the selfie generation

Final thoughts…it was the right choice for me . I have been stopped many times in restaurants and even in the street to say that my hair is fabulous and is it natural? I get a bit pink but am totally chuffed….

Yet again ahead of my time, it seems to be the height of fashion. Even the young in Paris and London are paying to go grey either fully or partially. I did it first girls…and I guess I am lucky, it’s maybe not for everyone.

 

I told you so!

More musings and probably now mutterings from Marseille…

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I realised a while back that I am not always right (infact I am often wrong) but what a relief. How boring would it be to always  get it right,  living in a world of total nicompoops.?  So I try not to beat myself up when I make mistakes or huge, huge boo-boo’s.

Yet last Sunday, I smashed it. Nothing world changing just a win in the environment of my teeny, tiny,  mrs pepperpot household. So let me explain briefly. The door to the kitchen larder (have yearned all my life for one of those) was a bit broken, in that the door could not be shut.  To make it brief: a metal rod thing that was fixed into the floor tiles but yet grooved into the inward opening door frame had come adrift.  Anyone still with me?

So this all happened about a month ago.  Frog is in charge of bricolage -diy.  What a relief after years and years of doing it all myself.  Even managed to put in a dimmer switch once without killing anyone…Anyway, Frog had been mulling it over  all this time which means he didn’t have a clue.  Not easy as there was no obvious solution but enough was enough.  So Sunday morning he got down to business.  I could see that after ten minutes he was getting crosser and crosser as it was tricky but in my world , all problems have solutions without  totally losing the plot.  If that fails a good cry will do.  Anyhoo, he tried to get into the larder to fix it from within but I obviously feed him too well and  it was so not going to work. How I wish I had taken a photo of him then..

“Ma chérie” he said and to paraphrase- maybe we should just accept defeat and take the door off and put another curtain up.  The French love curtains instead of cupboard doors- I don’t have wardrobe doors anymore just sets of curtains.  Charming for a while but they get dusty and you can’t totally shut off how your tee shirts are not perfectly arranged or colour co-ordinated.  ( A touch of ocd maybe? ).

So this was the impetus I needed: ” Let me try, I am smaller than you- I know I can do it “, French shrug was the reply and “et après?”. Well, I did manage to  reverse my way in: thank you to my Italian genes for making me short, thank you for my gym membership to allow me to burn off some of the wine  calories that I drink and a final thanks to my wonderful yoga teachers that I had in London who helped me achieve “the crow” and other weird bendy positions. Great Oscar speech methinks!

Pre-ending got the rod back in it’s socket – no idea how! Frog then told me that washers were needed underneath to raise the door or it would scrape.  So I dismantled it again – still no idea how and then refixed it, again, no idea how but clearly the angel of bricolage was on my shoulder . But heck she must be truly skinny cos really no room in there- must ask her for her régime!

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Pyjamas Primark – Spring Collection 2016!

 

PS: Frog was very tempted to shut me in and it would  be impossible to get out but I had described  in detail what I would be cooking for lunch and so yet again greed got the better of him (phew)

PS: After my victory , I was inspired to totally reorganise the larder and to do a total spring clean – even polished the silver (yep more ocd  and more tomorrow).

PPS: I have got so used to the door being broken that I keep forgetting to shut it. For goodness sake!

PPPS: If nothing is heard from me for a while, please check the larder. I have enough rations for a week or so….

Et Toc!!!!!!

A new arrival……and a motley crew

More musings from Marseille

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See what I mean?

Twenty eight years ago today we had a new arrival in the family: our first baby –  a week early -a beautiful little girl. As I looked into her bright blue, all- knowing, all-seeing eyes ( they are still just as blue even now), I fell madly and deeply in love.  The rest of the world ceased to exist. So it was with a lump in my throat that I woke up this morning with the realisation that yet again, I would not be able to hand over her birthday gifts in person. Mothers get a bit sentimental about things like this.  Not to worry, she is coming out to visit next month and we will kick off our shoes and have lots of fun.   The 20/8/1988 was a very good day indeed, so happy birthday Loulou….xxx

Around the 1880’s (feel free to admire the link), the building I  live in used to be dormitory  for the nuns of a local convent. I’m not quite sure which one but until relatively recently much of the city belonged to the Catholic Church.  This discovery rather intrigued me and it made me think about the motley crew that are currently within these walls.  They couldn’t be more different!

FIRST FLOOR

Next door to us, is a very pleasant lady of Sardinian descent who was widowed young.  I don’t know her story but there are always wonderful smells of cooking wafting out of her flat.  Opposite we have some young Rumanian people packed in like sardines, even a baby or two.  We never hear a peep out of any of them and are only aware of their presence by the dirty trail left by builders’ boots that set me a-tutting . I don’t know their story either but the smells that permeate our hallway are an aquired taste. Next door to them,  is a family of maybe three or four people from I don’t where.  Very polite and very quiet.  Let’s just skip any description of their cooking odours, suffice to say it might well be broth made from old goat or donkey bones.  Entirely  possible, as I see no evidence of either creature in Marseille.

SECOND FLOOR

Frog’s brother lives upstairs with his partner and teenage son.  We  see quite a lot of them.  Opposite there is a lady of around my age (but she seems so much older)   Madame Bonbon to me.  I call her that as the first time I saw her, she accidentally dropped a sweet  from up above and it fell onto my head giving me quite a start.  I have never been into her flat but she does have a large poster of Betty Boop just inside her door and a peacock feather. Her shutters are never open and I suspect that housework is not her forte.  How could she have time when she is clearly busy tying little bows into her hair and applying sequins to her chest?  I lie not.  I will find a way to take a photo one day.  At Christmas, she likes to stick a (tacky) Christmas card,  addressed to all the neighbours on the wall in the main entrance. And there it stays along with her  previous ones and postcards from holidays. No one dares remove them for fear of causing offense.  Although, I do believe that the sticky-tape from some of the older ones has peeled away with the damp and whoops-a-daisy, they have found their way into the bin! This year she excelled herself by decorating all the mail boxes and the stairwell with cutsie Christmas stickers.  They have not remained. Perhaps peeled off and stored away for next time. Rumour has it that she was married to a violent man who died suddenly a while back.

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More stickers for all seasons. I desperately wanted to go upstairs and take a photo but thought it might be tricky to explain if caught!

 

 

 Finally there is Madame P, the doyenne of the building.  Very frail and pale she is rarely seen.  She too is a widow.  Are you beginning to sense a theme?  I cannot comment on the cooking smells from upstairs.

Goodness knows what they make of us  Frog and the strange half English/Italian woman who arrived one day and stayed!

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Chez nous

The only new arrival today was the oven two weeks past its due date!

 

 

Did I mention that I like to cook – part 2

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Well I really , really love to cook. Infact, I prefer cooking to eating. By the time I have tasted, poured my heart and soul into every meal (well nearly every meal) I find myself with no appetite. Just as well or I would be fatter than a fat thing. Imagine moving to France then, the pressure : ” mais les rosbifs ne savent pas cuisiner!” Absolute tosh!

It still irritates me that this awful reputation still lingers, that you can’t eat well in the UK. I would agree that in the 60’s and 70’s it was a bit dire but then the arrival of ‘nouvelle cuisine’ in the 80’s changed everything. Personally, I loved those expensive, beautiful plates of almost nothing that left your tummy growling for more fud!  That was the beginning. Then it just exploded… some of the best meals that I have ever eaten have been in London: Marco Pierre White when he had Harveys, then The Canteen – amazing! Le Gavroche – ok so it’s totally French and you have to book month’s ahead but I would be happy to starve to get a bowl of their consommé.  Infact, that could be my perfect diet: very expensive but delicious broth…yum!

So moving to France and the pressure of cooking for Frog’s family- totally nailed that. Was nervous at first, finding myself not just in a culture that cooks but in a family that COOKS!  Facile! Frog is super proud to have found the only English woman that can cook – ssshh! He doesn’t need to know  but he has got rounder since I arrived.  Maybe he is happy-I hope so!  Again, to be continued…..who knew that I would have so much to say about all this?

Did I mention that I love to cook?

Well I do and  I have for  as long as I can remember.  In particular, at around the age of three, I recall mixing and mixing a sickly sweet cake mixture.  With my fat little arms,  stiff from stirring the gloop with a  wooden spoon and a little trace of cake moustache around my mouth I was more than pleased with my efforts. What heaven! And lo and behold an hour or so later, I was invited back in to the kitchen to see the finished creation – a perfectly rectangular, iced chocolate cake.

The penny did not drop  immediately, that there had been no chocolate involved in my sticky mixture but after all I was only little and everything was possible.  I have no idea when ,but my mother did finally confess that she had binned the cement cake mixture and bought the chocolate cake from the milkman.  It was a time when milkmen still delivered and offered little extras too (nothing to be read into this please- orange juice, potatoes and the odd chocolate cake!!). Nevertheless, to tiny me it was magic.

My journey with cooking continued although I am not sure quite why. Perhaps I should explain that my father was English and my mother still is (93) very Italian. I believe that my father was very excited at the prospect of having an Italian wife  who would be able to prepare him wonderful meals but alas he married a woman from Italian aristocracy who didn’t even know how to boil an egg. Apparently she ‘fessed up on their wedding night but nonetheless, I was born nine months later…

So food in our household was interesting but often erratic. My mother did learn to cook  although her heart was never really in it, yet it introduced European cuisine to us in the 60’s – a little ahead of it’s time. Lasagne, vitello tonnato, risotto, scallopine alla milanese….what wonders alongside fish fingers and sausages. When my father cooked it was traditional British fare – roasts – wonderful beef on the bone* – lovely and rare, leg of lamb ( I always used to be given that wonderful sweet bits at the end- “smakerels”). But who made the best Yorkshire pudding to go with the beef – my mother! Perhaps they were a perfect match…. to be continued cos I am tired and might just waffle…bear with if you want too

 * yorkshire pudding will have to feature at some point!

 

MY WISH LIST- GONE BY 60

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Musings from Marseille

(Warning this is not depressing although it might be interpreted as such!)

Don’t get me wrong.  I am perfectly happy.  Actually I am a bit of a cross patch today but that has absolutely nothing to do with this blog. I was talking to “dear friend” on the phone the other night.  How I miss telephone contact with friends. The only phone calls I ever get here on the landline are from my mother- guaranteed to twist my gut or make me stuff my knuckles into my mouth, to stop me  from shouting at her loony thoughts, or from people trying to sell me life insurance – as if!!   Anyway, “dear friend” reminded me that I had proclaimed a while back that I do not wish to live beyond the age of 60.  That still stands and gives me another 3 potentially good years.

Don’t get me wrong, if I happen to wake up on May 26 2019, I am not going to take any action.  If mother nature is mean enough not to listen to my simple wish of taking my last breath peacefully whilst I sleep (in my best primark pj’s!) and passing it on in a kiss to someone who really wants it, well what can I do? Nothing but this is why.

I don’t really want to get any older, not too keen on this ageing process.  I find it demeaning. Basically it sucks. I am doing my very best to stay fit and healthy: quit smoking (finally and for the very last time – 11 months ago), joined a gym in February and have refound my rhythm 2/3 times a week and boy do I give it my best.  Don’t quite cut the figure I did in my 20’s, 30’s or even 40’s but I do give it my all.  And sometimes, just sometimes I come out feeling as if I could conquer the world.  Normally though, I am just hot, sweaty and pink cheeked -ok red as a tomato! . I eat well, healthily and that comes naturally. So why?

I just figure that another 3 years will be enough. I still have dreams of having a little house here in France with flowers spilling out of pots and herbs growing in my kitchen garden. Frog dreams of having his ‘man shed’ to set up his tools and potter about on various little projects.  Who knows, that might happen in which case I might beg for an extension.  At the moment, none of this looks likely, however.  Even if this did happen, I am not really sure that I like the way this world is going.  So much violence, so much anger, so much loneliness- young and old alike.

On a purely selfish basis: I don’t want to age any more physically or mentally. I hate that I can’t read without my glasses and even sometimes with them. I hate that I have to stand back a bit from people so that they do not have fuzzy faces. I don’t want to lose my teeth, my hair or find my boobs at knee level.  I have had fun.  I have had two wonderful children and am really proud but I miss them enormously every day.  I have had two important loves in my life and some really good friends, others who have just been transient.  I have travelled – first class, business and low cost. I have stayed in some amazing hotels and some dives too.  I have seen wonderful, wonderful things. I have seen terrible, terrible things too.  I have laughed and hooted to the point of wetting myself. Forbid that this should happen in the future without laughing!  In short, I have been blessed….